The biggest thing I have discovered since taking on this blog is how fast time actually goes when you are pregnant. It is crazy. I thought people were just being polite when they said it would ‘whizz by’ and go ‘so fast’ so ‘enjoy it while you can’. Well, in regards to the latter, I don’t think I will be one of those people who say they ‘miss being pregnant’. Whilst I have been extremely lucky and had a pretty good experience compared to a lot of others, I’ll be happy once my little man is out and in my arms. I miss being in control of my own body, being able to sleep on my stomach and tie my shoes. It sounds selfish, I don’t intend it to come across this way. Growing this human has been a beautiful, life changing experience. I just have my days when I feel like I am really struggling. The upside? The end is near! So close now I sometimes wake up throughout the night and think ‘holy shit, in just a couple of weeks I am likely to be waking up to a crying baby’ – my crying baby. I miss being reasonable with my partner and not being a total bitch for no valid reason. I can’t put it all down to hormones, I guess maybe I don’t want to tell him how I am really feeling (scared as hell) and that I struggle to even stand for long periods of time at the moment. I am sure in time, once we both adjust, things will slowly return back to normal. I love him dearly and there is nobody I would rather be on this journey with, I don’t doubt for 1 second that he isn’t going to be the most amazing dad to our son and I can’t wait for that first moment I see him look at our baby and feel the unconditional love.
Currently as I write this we have 4 weeks and 5 days to go. I have grown a LOT over the past week, so much so that others have noticed. Everything has started to become so much more real. I have finished up in the office last week, am working from home for the next week and then I will attempt to switch off completely (anybody who knows me will laugh at that comments and it will prove to be near impossible). We have been to 3 antenatal class (and HATE it). We’ve learnt nothing, we don’t like the teaching style and are contemplating our options and if we bother going back. I can safely say now I think we have most things ready, we just need to buy a nappy bin and I need to make the bassinette (went on a sheet washing mission).
I have a funny feeling that I am going to blink and the next few weeks will be gone burger. I will do my best to do regular updates over the final weeks (no promises as my track record hasn’t been great to date).
Until next time! x