Do you know what? If only we supported each other as much as we judged each other, the world would be a far happier place. You don’t know what they’ve been through, you don’t even need to know, it’s not your place to pass judgement or make assumptions.
This topic is a highly controversial one because people choose to make it that way. Throwing opinions around about what is deemed to be best for you and your child based on their own personal beliefs.
It’s your child, your business, nobody else’s.
Certain aspects of parenting have been made so taboo that a lot of us feel a lot of unnecessary shame and guilt because of the way society pushes their own beliefs on us. Like breastfeeding. We all know its ‘best’, but it’s not always possible. A woman, like myself who are unable to or are no longer breastfeeding for whatever reason feel like we’ve failed ourselves and our child. I think it’s bullshit to make a woman feel this way. Like we haven’t already been through enough.
We can all do our bit to stop all this stupid mum shaming. We shouldn’t have to justify or feel guilt around our decisions. Smile at that mum sitting there bottle feeding her baby, you don’t know her story. That smile could change her day.
Change the way you think, what worked for you may not work for others.
Each mum is going through and has been through things you will never know or understand so show a bit of understanding and compassion to those around you, regardless of their decisions, your beliefs and what society deems appropriate.
I am sick of hearing about what means of feeding my child are best, it doesn’t matter – he is fed and that’s the most important part. I am sick of seeing Mum’s ripping other Mum’s online because they’ve decided to front face their child in the car after 2 years. I am sure they’re well aware of all of the recommendations but it is THEIR decision. I am sick of seeing parents slamming other Mum’s because they’re feeding their child a particular food while being out in public. I am sick of people passing judgement because they’ve chosen to co-sleep with their child and I am also sick to death of people saying “oh that child is far too old to still have a dummy”. Do you know what? Fuck off. Fuck right off and take your opinions with you. Worry about yourself and your child because by passing judgement, staring or making comments to your partner, you’re inadvertently making that person feel like absolute shit.
A lot of us are new to this whole mum thing and all of this judgement does not make a hard responsibility any easier. Cut each other a bit of slack. If a mum chooses to live the sponsored life brand repping for brands on Instagram, let her. But remember, she is a real person just like the rest of us. That mum who is bottle feeding their child, it’s actually breastmilk (it wouldn’t even matter if it was formula) because she is in agony from feeding but still wants to do what’s deemed ‘best’ for her child. That mother hiding in the parents room at the mall bottle feeding her child is sick of the looks she gets so is feeding her child in private and that is not OK.
Let’s all do our bit to support and empower fellow mamas. Think before you speak and have a bit of compassion.
You do you. Let them do them.