Um. Can you not?

Do you know what is one of my pet peeves online? And I said ‘one of’ as there is now quite an impressive list, more so since becoming a parent. I don’t know quite how to explain this or even if there is a name for this type of person so I’ll do my best.

I post a photo of my baby sleeping –
Me – “Aw, he is so cute, I love that he is such a good sleeper”
In come the flurry of comments
“Oh, he won’t be for long, it’ll change”
“Just wait until he’s 5” 
“It’s just a phase”

Me – “YAY! He’s crawling”

“Oh, just you wait until he’s walking!”
“NOTHING IS SAFE ANYMORE”
“My boy was crawling ages ago”

Honestly. Shut the fuck. Let me celebrate or be happy about a developmental milestone without you ramming it down my throat that my child is going to change and oh my, grow up! I am well aware but you don’t need to be a buzz kill and put a damper on EVERY. SINGLE. MOMENT! Better yet, keep it to yourself. Just because your child did something, doesn’t mean mine will (or vice versa). It drives me INSANE. Seriously, like why do you even feel the need to comment like that? Does it make you feel better? Like your child is more advanced or something?

I’ll call them captain buzzkills. I asked Reuben for a suitable title, he came back with “my dad is better than your dad”. I couldn’t help but laugh, I see where he was going, but maybe not the most descriptive title for the topic, however, these ‘captain buzzkills’ are EVERYWHERE. Lurking, ready to challenge and compete with you over every pointless fucking detail in their (or your) lives. I generally just give them the ‘seen’ or ignore their comment altogether. Sometimes maybe it’s completely innocent but when it comes to new parents I genuinely think you really need to watch what you say because most are already in a vulnerable state. I always try to be really careful what I say when I am having a conversation about Baxter and they ask when he did such and such (or whatever) and I am always so anxious and aware so always respond with “well every kid is so different but…”. Yes, I have this blog, but I have no idea what the fuck I am doing, I am no expert. All I know is what I’ve learnt over the duration of the last year.

Before you comment next time Ranty McRanterson. Maybe don’t. If it is not going to help in any way then it’s probably not wanted. I am well aware that Baxter won’t do certain things forever and that I have been lucky in some aspects but really, keep your shit comments to yourself.

 

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First taste of cake. Oh my god, he’ll be addicted to sugar and his teeth will fall out. He’s going to be obese.

 

 

7 Comments Add yours

  1. Amy says:

    I think this to myself A LOT! There is way too many people out there like that I’ve found since having our daughter! Fab blog πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. jes says:

    Or you get the ones who have to tell every single thing that has happened/been learnt. Like I am in a baby group on Facebook with parents of babies around my son’s own age, and we do a #BabyTuesday post. All it requires is an updated photo of you bub, and every week the posts appear with new, “my kid can do this, my kid can do that, oh mine has been doing this for this amount of time.” I call it the ‘cock measuring contest’ which is very much the ‘mine is better than yours because..’ I find it quite silly, babies are not meant to be a competition of who can do what first and are all meant to be growing and developing at different ages/stages, so really there should be no competition.

    Like

  3. daniellewills says:

    It is horribly annoying – even though I’m sure most are well intended or not realising how it feels to be on the receiving end of those comments. My milestones at the moment are more like # of times waking up (teething) so I’m holding onto comments of ‘they’ll change soon’ like a lifeline!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. missussel says:

    Jess, yes!!!!!! And the NEVER ending advice / opinion / eye-raising from the oldies when they hear she STILL isn’t sleeping through the night.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Emily says:

    Oh my goodness yes! Don’t know how many times I’ve been told my next baby won’t be so placid, my next baby won’t sleep through the night. Well why not?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Aja says:

    love this post – amen sistah – tell em to shuddup already!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Sez says:

    This is why I haven’t announced my pregnancy on Facebook. The comments I get are bad enough in real life: “I can’t wait until you get fat…”, “Your life is over”, “Enjoy everything while you can” etc etc Ummm I’m not naive the reason I waited until I was 30 was so I was prepared (as much as you can be) for the challenges but it’s like I’m not allowed to be excited about all the exciting stuff too 😦

    Like

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