Week 17 // # 2

I’ve just realised I’ve barely made any updates in regards to my second pregnancy aside from the announcement itself. So if you missed it.. yes, I am pregnant (again!). Baby is due in April.

I am currently 17 weeks and this pregnancy has been nothing like the first. I am not sure if that’s just how it is with your second pregnancy or if it’s an indication of gender as some like to say (I wish). I personally am just taking it all as it comes and whatever will be, will be.

People say “oh, do you have a preference?” well, a healthy baby would be great! I would be happy with either, of course, it’d be nice to have a girl so we have one of each as this is it for us. We’ve talked long and hard about this, it is what WE want. We always wanted to have the 2 in close succession while things are still fresh for us and we can re-use things of Baxters. We’re still in that baby mentality and remember (very vividly) what it is like to have a newborn so for us, it’s easier to have #2 now and ‘get it over with’ so to speak. They’ll be about 19m apart and that’s a great gap for us plus it means they’ll hopefully grow up to be the best of friends.

I am finding with this pregnancy, I don’t have that much time on my hands to think about it and dwell on things. I am somewhat mentally prepared from the first. I know the pregnancy is going to be a bit shit and the whole birth part, well, it hurts like fuck but the pain is only temporary and the outcome is SO worth it. Working full time, running the blog and having Baxter to run around after keeps me pretty busy, I often need to refer to a phone app to tell me how many weeks I am. Baxter stays home with Reuben these days so that definitely takes some pressure off but even the most menial of tasks are a bloody mission these days because I am just so damn tired all the time. The bump appeared much earlier than last time, they say this is pretty normal also. I am concerned just how big I am going to get – haha.

I am lucky to not have had a bad run with morning sickness, I’ve definitely experienced my fair share of nausea which was somewhat similar to my pregnancy with Baxter.

I looked into coming off my PND medication but after thorough discussions with my fiancee, midwife and GP, we all decided it was best for my mental health to stay on them. They’re no risk to the baby and why change if it’s working for me right now? The weeks of weaning off them were fucking horrific and I am kicking myself for even attempting it, I wasn’t ready but thought it was best. It wasn’t. Sometimes it’s OK to admit defeat and admit that things aren’t OK.

Does Baxter know mummy has a baby in her tummy? Nope, I think he is still just too young (14m). I have told him and on the odd occasion he will put his hand on my belly but he gets more of a kick off sticking his grubby fingers in my belly button, lol.

I totally watched the clock with Baxter and now I simply don’t have the time and it’s scary to think in just 3 weeks we’ll be at the half way point!